Leaders throughout banks everywhere emphasize the value and importance of coaching, a position with which I wholeheartedly agree. Yet, I've often observed that one aspect of successful coaching often goes underdiscussed: the importance of being and remaining coachable.
At first blush, this might seem like no big deal. Surely, most everyone sees the benefit of being coached. The desire to improve, become more productive and be happier in our jobs is universal. Right?
However, I find that too many people do not sense the coaching they receive as being particularly useful in achieving these goals.
That said, the responsibility doesn't solely lie with the manager conducting the coaching. Sure, they largely control the timing, setting, method and purpose of the feedback and suggestions. But I emphasize that the effectiveness of coaching depends every bit as much on the person receiving as giving coaching.
Many leaders, from senior to frontline, often nod in agreement. "Hey, it's not our coaching that's ineffective — it's those employees!" (That's mostly a joke.)
I then emphasize that a lack of openness to coaching does not necessarily indicate someone is a bad person or a poor employee. It simply means they are human.
We all tend to overestimate our openness and receptivity to feedback, whether it involves basic observations, critiques or suggestions. For new team members, there's a possibility that they have never experienced productive coaching in a job setting before.
In such situations, many tend to be more defensive than receptive. They perceive it as something being done to them, rather than for their benefit.
I frequently ask leaders to think back to their own sessions with supervisors in the past. Were they ever a touch defensive? Were they a little suspicious of motives? Did it feel like something that was only done to check boxes and document that it was done?
Maybe their personal coaching situations have always been great. And then maybe there was a bit of uneasiness, especially if their supervisor was new to them or had not been consistent with feedback. In other words, they only seemed to get attention when something is wrong.
I then repeat, "That doesn't mean you were a bad person or poor employee. That means you were human."
The point is, despite the considerable time, energy and resources invested in coaching our personnel, if the person being coached is more defensive than receptive to the feedback, it leads to being a waste of everyone's time.
In such cases, these exercises can actually become detrimental.
Ten months after the Raleigh, North Carolina, company acquired a large chunk of Silicon Valley Bank, it says it is seeing good progress in keeping and winning back the latter's former customers. But the ongoing slowdown in private equity and venture capital activity will challenge the unit's growth.
Participants leave these sessions feeling worse than when they entered. However, this doesn't mean coaches should avoid addressing negative issues. Acknowledging areas that need improvement is crucial for making positive changes.
Most organizations provide managers with (usually HR-approved) lists of do's and don'ts for coaching their teams. Considerable time is invested in helping our managers develop into better coaches.
To support those efforts, I propose that consistently promoting to our personnel the personal benefits of being coachable can significantly enhance coaching success. This is as true for our most senior team members as it is for this month's new hires.
One of my favorite people in banking is one of the more successful and respected bank presidents in the industry. A mantra of hers is "Feedback is a gift." When she says that, she is not implying that feedback is always fun and positive.
In fact, some of the memorable coaching sessions she refers to came from a supervisor she didn't particularly like. This person tended to be rather blunt and egoistic, and she seldom felt entirely at ease during their one-on-ones.
She explained, "But I had to learn to focus on the big picture. He wasn't a 'people person,' but he provided objective feedback that was helpful to me. I wasn't always fond of the delivery, but in the end, he helped make me better at my job."
Today, she tells young bankers that one of the most valuable traits to develop is the ability to put ego aside and accept objective feedback and advice.
I frequently advise leaders that one of the surest ways to help their teams remain coachable is to strive to acknowledge things people are doing well. Do it often and consistently. Do it formally and informally. But do it.
Employees become far more open to accepting input, advice and even constructive criticism from people who also show they see our strengths. We become far more receptive to coaching and striving for improvement.
Embracing feedback as a valuable tool for personal growth, irrespective of its delivery, is a testament to one's professional maturity.
Organizations that emphasize not just coaching but the importance of remaining coachable tend to develop more talented and engaged teams.
